and i'm broke again.
who knew groceries could eat up so much of your money? oh god...this really sucks. i need the money to get the flight from johor to kuching. maybe in a few more weeks. its almost the end of the month, and i'll be getting my allowance again in about a week. which also means more rent to pay. october has about 4 weeks. so i'll use the deposit to pay the last few weeks here.
there's still stuff that needs to be settled. besides next year's accommodation. honestly i've stopped caring. i know i should but there's just too much on my mind right now. namely, how am i going to finish 2 essays in these 2 weeks? its not entirely impossible, but i also need to study for the upcoming exams next month. i'm quite left behind with the readings for eng 111. oh GOD, why keats AGAIN?? i got so tired of him studying for the a-levels. the only poems i like from him are ode to melancholy and a few more, i forgot what now. whats the name of the guy who wrote the one about the plums in the icebox that he ate that he knew were being saved for breakfast? i liked that poem :P
rachel and i were talking about smoking the other day..well, online anyway. she asked if i would ever take up smoking. (makes it sound like a hobby, eh?) i wouldnt. but i dont have anything against anyone who smokes. its not that i've never tried it, because i have. i just dont want to. mainly because its bad for my skin. i know i sound vain, but its MY SKIN and if i dont take care of it, nobody else will and i have to live with it the rest of my life. plus its something people will see and notice when they see you. i really think skin is something worth taking care of as best as your time and money allows you to. the effort is worth it, because you have to see yourself everyday. you might as well have good skin, ya know? so i dont want to get premature wrinkles around my mouth or anywhere on my face that could be avoided simply by not smoking. i mean, there's already UV aging to deal with. plus cigarettes cost money. its one easy way to cut your budget.
another reason is cause i dont want to have an addiction. if you know me, you know that i drink to forget. and its bad, but up to this point, i dont do it anymore. mainly cause i'm broke and i dont want to anymore. i used to have other ways to deal with pressure and whatnot but i've stopped all that too. i dont want to depend on things to make me feel better. because its temporary and its not real. its just a distraction from whatever i'm trying to forget or hide.
i guess thats another reason why i got so sick of clubbing. i mean, i like dancing and i really enjoy it. but i'll be kidding myself if i told you that bad music was the only gripe i had about the nightlife. there's smelly, drunk people all around you (well, duh, its a club) and i'm not in the mood to dance with anyone when the crowd gets a lil too rowdy. and touchy. and smelly. ugh. while girls nights out are really fun, i think its a better idea if you can get a few guys in your little feng tao entourage (read: your clubbing crew) i just feel safer that way. if you cant have your boyfriend there lah. cause if he's there, nobody would dare touch you or come near you :D oh the security!! its like your own personal bouncer who dances with you :) and takes care of you. if he doesnt, you better dump his sorry ass cause he's just not worth it. especially if he's eyeing other women. you have my FULL blessing to slap him and stomp on his instep with your gorgeous but pain-inflicting stillettos :P
wow, i didnt think i'd blog about all that when i started. guess i'm on a ROLL.
oh since we're on the topic of skin (well we were earlier) i realised one of the easiest things you can do to maintain good skin is to wash your face before you sleep. i used to do that and i didnt have so many zits as i do today. so from today onwards, i shall revert to that good habit i used to have and hopefully by the time summer comes round, i'll have better skin :) and i can learn other things to do with photoshop besides erase zits :)
if you know how to unblur pictures with photoshop, please let me know. i have some nice pics, but they're blurry.
i'm going to miss some of the friends i've made this year.
i'm a lil tired now so i better take a nice hot shower and a nap before tackling one essay. and i gotta stop sleeping in class. i think i fell asleep twice in 2 classes this week, and very nearly fell asleep in tutorial. i really cant help it tho, i can be quite tired when i go to uni, esp after work.
so...goodnight everyone :P